This piece was written for the Six Sentence Challenge, with the prompt word of ‘reserve’.
When Alfie Centauri announced that he’d discovered where in the universe all the odd socks that disappeared in the weekly wash ended up, the responses from the public were culturally diverse (which of course was much to the satisfaction of ‘woke’ people) and tinged with a sense of reserve.
Hipsters said they never had that problem because they’d given up wearing them years ago to concentrate on growing beards and opening barista bars, where they could converse at length with customers about the quality of the crema and the impeccable FairTrade credentials of their beans.
App developers in Silicon Valley didn’t stop working on ways to embed cheap computer chips in socks so that they could always be tracked down, just like FindMyPhone, using a new technology called FoxMySox.
Obsessive-compulsive people smiled smugly, having for years pinned their pairs of socks together or bagged them before putting them in the wash and then hanging them out to dry in a similar manner.
Bachelors questioned whether it was even a problem because they simply bought the same brand and colour of socks exclusively, meaning they could never experience a mismatch and, over time, a lone sock would join another orphan to form a new pair.
Truth to tell, Alfie’s revelation that they all ended up in space and formed a growing Hose Zone Layer that would eventually provoke a new Ice Age largely went unremarked upon, except at NASA (the Nomadic and Absent Sock Agency), which promptly nominated him for the IgNobel Awards.
Six Crooked Highways 
Definitely a solution to the problem: buy the “same brand and colour of socks exclusively”.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Indeed, Frank.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Each sentence funny on its own but Hose Zone Layer in a class of its own!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Geoff. I was pretty happy with that one myself. 🙂
LikeLike
Socks and their propensity for losing their mates a source of satire? Absolutely, when Doug is in the house, lol
Entertaining as always, Doug 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Denise.
LikeLiked by 1 person
You left out one group of people, those who intentionally wear odd socks as a statement of their refusal to conform and to save time in the mornings.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Typical bloody anarchist! 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Great tale Doug, and I agree, same brand, same colour. Problem Solvered
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, NNP. And indeed that was my solution for many years, until the kids started buying me socks and jocks ad the go to Xmas present. 😉
LikeLiked by 1 person
I’m with ‘Geoff’*
Pun of the week: Hose Zone Layer!
excellent
* clearly Jeff should have his spellchek tuned up… the ways the Machines think words should be spelled**
** lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
Many thanks, clark.
LikeLike
Funny piece, Doug, with some truly dire puns (the best kind).
I especially liked (Where the) FoxMySox!
PS I solved this problem decades ago by always wearing mismatched pairs.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, ceayr. Is there no end to your anarchy. 🙂
LikeLike
Really entertaining … as it is each week.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, UP.
LikeLike
Oh, Doug. You truly are an incorrigible punster. This just got better and better (or is it worse and worse?)
Well done Sir Punster.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, D. My work here is pun. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
😒
LikeLiked by 1 person
Hozone layer was in the original Sniglets book. Well done!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Mimi, for introducing me to Sniglets, which I hadn’t heard of until now. (That’s surprising because Rich Hall is in my handful of genuinely funny comedians.) That said, I have heard of ‘bozone’ and ‘hozone’ before but I’m claiming ‘Hose Zone’ as an original. 🙂
LikeLike
Still laughing, Doug, you incredible, incorrigible punster! 😂🤣😂
LikeLiked by 1 person
Many thanks, Chris. The Devil makes me do it. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
brilliant, interesting, and entertaining. Though I took my own time to understand.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you so much, Indira. My writing can be a bit like that. 🙂 And thank you for re-blogging and following.
LikeLiked by 1 person
No, no, it is high class than my standard. No, I am not underestimating myself. I actually started learning English with my blogging. It’s my pleasure to re-blog a good piece of writing.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Reblogged this on Sharing Thoughts.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Good God! (Topples over in a state of shock)
LikeLiked by 1 person
🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person
A sheer delight, Doug. ‘Hose Zone Layer’ – definitely pun of the day!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Many thanks, Jenne.
LikeLiked by 1 person
This is awesome! I for reals did find out that dryer did indeed eat my socks. It was acting up and the repair person found a sock which went into the wrong space.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks, Lisa. That sock should have been in outer space with all of its siblings. 🙂
LikeLiked by 1 person