This piece was written in response to this photo on the Unicorn Challenge.
The selling agent, dressed in garish clothing and with a considerable belly hanging over his tightly cinched belt, took a jaundiced look at me before saying ‘I’ve given up my golf game for this so you better not be just another mooring rope kicker.’
‘No, no, not at all’ I protested. ‘I’m a genuine collector and I’ve been enthralled since I saw it on SeaBay.’
The agent began his pitch. ‘This craft is a meticulous reproduction of Black Bart’s Royal Fortune.’
I interrupted him with ‘Which one?’
‘What do you mean, which one? This is unique.’
‘Sorry, I’m not suggesting it’s not a unique copy. It’s just that Black Bart had several ships, all named Royal Fortune. So which one is this a copy of?’
The agent, reassured that I was indeed a genuine collector, said ‘I’ll look into that for you, sir. But as I said, it is a unique copy of … what it was copied from. I apologise for my scepticism earlier. It’s just that we get so many smart alecs wasting our time. You know the sort of thing. “How many miles to the galleon?” “Is it aaaaarghed to handle?”
I indicated my sympathy and said ‘That’s OK. I only have one other question. Do the masts fold down?’
‘I’m sorry, sir, I ….’
‘It’s just that if the masts don’t fold down, I won’t be able to get it into the bottle.’
The agent’s face went from red to puce and I took off.
Six Crooked Highways 
You picked a fine time to leave, Doug.
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I think so. 🙂
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Got a very good chuckle from me
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Then my work here is done. 🙂
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Oh dear, oh dear!
Laughing.
Would you have purchased with BayPal?
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Almost certainly. 🙂
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Everyone’s a comedian!
“Mooring rope kicker”, “BayPal”.
Maybe he’ll get lucky and he’ll get it for sail!
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Why not throw caution to the wind. ‘You… could… use… PayWave’. (Groan.)
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Not groaning but laughing. You win, Obb. 🙂
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I prefer to think I lost disgracefully!
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Cue the Benny Hill theme song as the chase scene heats up! 😂😂😂🐧
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Oh, no, no scantily clad wenches were chased at the end. 🙂
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Maybe they gave up the chase all too soon?
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Damn! You sailed it this week for sure, Doug.
I, for one, have been Jonesing for a nautical for another nautical prompt photo.
yes, I will stop. Leave all the pun for the pros.
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Love it, Doug. Wonderful finish to a very punny story. Still laughing. Makes me wish I wanted to buy a boat, jusy so I could use your penultimate line.
Hoping to write a story by tomorrow. I’ve been a wee bit busy helping me auld mucker to get his book ready for Amazon publication. And I don’t want any nonsense about asking why the author had time to write a story and the helper didn’t!🙃
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Thanks, Jenne. The joy of running your own prompt site is you can never be late. As for a certain ‘gentleman’ and his work habits, I say nothing! 😉
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A masterful take Doug, thanks for my laugh of the day!
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Thanks, Keith. Glad to be of humorous service. 🙂
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