This piece was written for the weekly photo prompt from the Unicorn Challenge.
‘Mr. Dooverlacky, I’m here on behalf of the Amalgamated Conductors, Wheeltappers and Dining Car Operatives Union to demand an explanation as to the new installation in the staff ablutions area.’
‘So, Alf, you want to know about the purpose of the Accoutrement Bleu in the staff lavatory? Perhaps you imagine it might be a surveillance device to act as a stool pigeon? Or a wee measurement tool to see which employees are making a welter of their relief breaks? No, no, no. It’s there as a management-funded benefit for our employees.’
‘Then you’ll need to explain its purpose, because my members ain’t half got their knickers in a knot about what it is.’
‘Certainly, Alf. It’s what we call The Blue Box Of Happiness. No longer will Charlie’s prostrate have him prostate in frustration. Miss Faversham will be able to enjoy all the movements of Beethoven’s Fifth unrestrained. And all staff will be able to rearrange their undergarments for maximum comfort without the embarrassment of attempting to do so surreptitiously in the course of their duties.’
‘So what’s the purpose of the big red eye in the middle then? Is that some sort of camera?’
‘Perish the thought, Alf. That simply indicates it is functioning.’
‘Why not a green light then?’
‘Well, not to put too fine a point on it, we were concerned that it might encourage all sorts of licentiousness. Behind closed doors and that sort of thing, what.’
‘Agreed, sir. Now if you don’t mind, nature calls.’
Six Crooked Highways 
Oh sh… sugar! We shoulda known better than to give you an opening to take the erm, mickey, Doug.
I particularly liked Mr B’s Fifth movement, and I’m relieved (schoolboy snigger) that you kept it family-friendly.
I hope we can now consider the slate (and everything else) wiped clean.
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Some lit groups do ‘ave ’em. 😉
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And you talk to me about pixies!
Nice one, Doug.
(But I did learn a new expression – to make a welter of.)
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There you go. Fun and education in the same post. 🙂
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ceayr said it best, talk about muleta and bulls in a Thesaurus Shoppe!
;p
trying to find something to contribute in a pun, but so far nothin”!
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C’mon Clark. Think of One and Two for starters?
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🙂
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Straining Management credulity there Doug.
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Tee-hee!
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Stool pigeon.
I do believe that one slid by unnoticed ….
or, at the very least, no one commented.
Smooth move. 😁
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Didn’t get past your watchful eye though. 🙂
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sorry, everyone!
nothin’
guess I’m just too much of a regular guy
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Toilet humour extraordinare. You’re really on a roll!
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You saw the pun and had to run with it, 😉
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Amazing. Hilarious. I’m speechless.
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Glad you liked it, Margaret. 🙂
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I’d been thinking about an econo-sized Tardis, but just couldn’t pull it together.
You had me laughing, for sure!
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