This piece was written in response to the weekly photo prompt from the Unicorn Challenge.
‘So, theories, Detective Constable.’
‘Hit and run, gov. By aliens.’
‘Based on what?’
‘Well, gov, the ambos said that they couldn’t find a heartbeat. Or anything else because all his organs had been vacuumed up by some sort of probe applied to his nether regions.’
‘And the object in his hand?’
‘Sunscreen, gov.’
‘Sunscreen?’
‘Yes, gov. Clearly these were aliens originating from the Sun. He’s seen the intense solar rays and legged it, hoping the sunscreen would save him.’
‘The Sun?’
‘Well, stands to reason, gov. If they were coming from the Moon he wouldn’t have panicked and run into the road.’
‘So you’ve excluded the possibility of a drunk who’s gone to sleep in the middle of the road, whiskey bottle in hand, and been flattened by a passing truck?’
‘Oh, yes, gov. Because that’s what the aliens want us to believe. They’re cunning little baskets.’
‘So, tell me, Detective Constable, where did you gain your detailed knowledge of the methods of nefarious aliens?’
‘Well, it’s all over the internet, isn’t it, gov? I mean, what if the powers that be are in on it and want to cover it up. Maybe they’re aliens that have infiltrated the system. Just sayin’, gov.’
‘So, if I were to say to you that this is the greatest load of nonsense I’ve heard in 30 years on the force, how would you respond?’
‘I would totally agree, gov, because I wouldn’t want to spoil my chances of promotion. Nudge, nudge, wink, wink.’
Six Crooked Highways 
That constable has fallen on his truncheon a few too many times.
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That’s what happens when you climb the greasy pole. 😉
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Think they’ll believe we did not plan this? 😉
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I doubt it. 🙂
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As do I. Great, fun write, Doug.
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It’s fake news…quick, blame it all on your political opponent! 😆
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He’s just Biden his time before he plays his Trump card. 😉
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😂😂😂 Watch out for Haley’s comet…!☄
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That young constable will go far, sad to say! Fun story, Doug.
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For some reason – ie commenting via my phone – I became anonymous!
There’s probably a parable in that somewhere.
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… or a new secret power. 🙂
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like the old joke, “we plan to land on the Sun. That’s impossible! We’ll be doing it at night!”
excellent Shaggy Dog story
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Thanks, clark. Gotta love The Goons.
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The best part of this story for me was the sunscreen theory. He saw the rays and ran and… just happened to have some sunscreen with him! I loved that. My second best part is that I could read it with an accent like see/hear on TV and I didn’t feel goofy.
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Thanks, Michael. Who knew my story came with that bonus. 🙂
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Oh, the cynics win again 😉
A fun piece that captures the genre beautifully
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An alien vacuum probe attached to his ‘nether regions’! And sunscreen! Hilarious.
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Thanks, Margaret. 🙂
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I literally laughed out loud from the beginning of the story to the end of the last comment! Funniest piece ever. This is the true you – so quick, so funny, so out of the box!
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Many thanks, Marsha. You are a dream audience.
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An audience of many, I hope – not just me. 🙂
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