Two for one today in response to the Divine Denise’s Six Sentence Challenge, with the prompt word of ‘detour’.
Detourmentia
It began with her putting the kettle in the fridge and calling everybody ‘darling’ because she couldn’t remember their names. Then she copied the young women’s craze for ash-blond streaks in her hair and started sending money to the man in Africa that she’d met on a dating site. Her rooms were soon full with goods that she’d bought online, boxes unopened. Only when she bought a gleaming white sports convertible and drove it into town to browse the clothes shops, wearing only a fur coat and her underwear, did her daughters put her in a nursing home. In her garage they found her collection: No Stopping. No U-turn. One Way. Steep Descent. All the signs were there.
Ted’s famous cattle drive
Ted watched his grandson, Artemus, alight from the school bus and they began their weekday ritual of walking home, where Grandma Rose would be waiting with home-made biscuits warm from the oven and chocolate-flavoured milk. Ted said “Ya know, Artie, (damned if he was going to call him by that pretentious name his son and daughter-in-law had picked) when I was your age we walked three miles to school, even if it was snowing.”
Artie sighed “You did not, Grandpa, Great Aunt Sally told me you lived practically next door.”
That bloody sister of mine and her big mouth again, thought Ted as they walked on in silence for a while, until he said “Ya know, Artie, I once drove a mob of cattle from Queensland to Tasmania.”
“Grandpa, Tasmania is an island, so how did you cross Bass Strait?”
Smart Alec kid, thought Ted and said “I took a detour.”
Six Crooked Highways 
It’s a two-fer, for sure! Paints a picture, tells a story, and leaves us groaning with heavy PUN-ishment.
Well served!
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I was going to add sides to the meal but they split. 😉
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Both good responses to the prompt… and so different.
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Thanks, Janis
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I like your description of Ted and Artemus trying to have an intergenerational conversation. I think Ted is right about the name “Artemus”.
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Thanks, Frank
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The first story puts me in a sombre mood. How often do we fail to recognize symptoms that mental health is failing…
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That’s true, Reena, but the more we know, the better we can approach the situation. Mind you, in my own case, I’ve always been eccentric enough that it will be difficult for anyone to tell. 🙂
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Two great Sixes, Doug!
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Thanks, Chris. Always appreciated.
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Liked the punchline on the second Six*
*that would be the twelfth ?!!
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Thanks, clark. Yes, just like Christmas. 😉
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The second story I liked.
The first one is a high-level GRRROOOAAANNNN!!!!!
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Just trying to point to a serious issue, ce, leavened with a dash of humour to make it more accessible.
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Absolutely right, Doug.
For many of us that is literally a fate worse than death, which is why Dignitas is a serious consideration.
My ‘groan’ was only at the joke.
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Deuxtour! Double the fun!
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That first is such a deep-seated fear, the last thing any of us want.
Grandpa sounds like he’s got one smart grandchild on his hands.
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Thanks, Mimi. Correct on both accounts.
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A sad, funny, and true tale for the 1st Six, Doug. 2nd Six was funny, not sad, and probably not true 😁😀
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Thanks, TAM. First one is total fiction. 2nd one is true and based on father and my nephew. 🙂
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Cool, Doug! Sometimes far-fetched is closer than it seems then 😎
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Your first story made me smile, Doug. Then I wanted to weep. And then I crossed my fingers that I might never live this. The humour emphasising the very serious point and most people’s – every person’s? – biggest fear.
And i loved the ‘Grumpy Old Man’ with the vivid imagination and the quick retort.
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Many thanks, Jenne. I find difficult subjects are sometimes best raised seemingly lightly e.g. getting someone to write a will by telling that if they don’t the current government will pocket the lot. 😉 The grumpy old man was my late father and the clever lad my nephew, who is now a medical scientist working on a cure for gastroenteritis.
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Two excellent takes, one troubling and the other amusing. Well done, Doug.
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Many thanks, Keith.
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The signs are there… we must always be looking out for the signs.
(I’m experiencing very strong déjà vu as I write this, Doug…)
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🙂
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Your well does indeed run deep, Doug. (pardon the alliteration!)
First Six – clever title, light touch to a frightening reality for so many. Your second Six, a very sweet story 🙂
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Many thanks, Denise
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Am I the only one who thought the first story was funny? The ending, that is. Dementia is sad and very serious and we all hope we won’t be the ones afflicted with it. That said, there are funny times, too, even for the one who has it. But the line “all the signs were there,” made me laugh. That was a double whammy, too because dementia can cause clutter and collections of stuff no one should collect – like signs. Anyway, two great stories.
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No, Marsha, you’re not the only one. Sickos are everywhere. 🙂 Seriously, the responses have been split fairly evenly but the key
outcome of people engaging with a serious issue was achieved I think. Even more importanter is that you liked them both. 🙂
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We had a few story chats like that. I’m not sure the authors even intended there to be a serious issue, but these issues have a way of making themselves heard. The one you presented is something we have all had to face in someone we loved, I’m sure. I pray that it doesn’t happen to us. There are three of us that moved to Prescott and one child between the three of us who lives about 12 hours of driving away from us. If we all head down that path, well… Let’s hope the signs are positive. 🙂 No pedestrian signs without heads.
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